Green Grass

My return imminent, I am bracing for the boredom of Toronto. Already the grass here is looking greener. Sure, there have been one or two irritations, but things could easily have been worse. As a teacher in Japan writes:

In my experience, most programs for Asian countries are little more than deceptive invitations to naifs (and among young teachers, especially ESLers, there are many) for situations whose greatest return is a tough lesson. Japan is certainly an example of a tough country where, for example, 50 US university branch campuses folded after a year or two (I was at two of these), and contains more stuck and struggling (though optimistic and proud) teachers than anyplace else I've been, including the middle east.

Here, however, little sparks of humor and joy continue to occur even in these waning days, igniting in me a premature nostalgia. For example, something very tragic happened during the exam for my pre-university students. One of the students was caught cheating, red-handed. Some of you may recall the name "Toffee," mentioned in a couple of my previous missives.

It's a terrible thing. It's not even me that spotted her, but Jim Wu. He saw her throw a piece of paper towards someone else (it wasn't clear who).

I may have quibbled about Wu once or twice, but in the end he's quite a pleasant fellow all the same.

Mr. Meng called me that evening about some administrative matter. I wished him a happy new year. (We're good friends again, with Wu reporting that he praises my efficiency to others.) I asked if he'd heard the news. He hadn't.

"One student was caught cheating on the exam. It was Toffee."

I was interested of course to see some sign of belated awareness, perhaps even a prostrate confession, that he and his colleagues had been risibly misguided to take up arms against me -- on behalf of a cheater! -- in the never-ending Toffee Wars.

"Unnnhh. Well, it's late," he said with a yawn. "I just wanted to touch base. Let's talk tomorrow [about the admin thing]."

Had he heard me? I wasn't in fact able to connect with him the next day. Coincidence? Or was he in hiding, the agony of shame and embarrassment -- or maybe the thought of my smile -- too much to bear?

You'll recall also David. Three days after my (previously described) meeting about him with the deans, he packed his bags and left the school. All I was told was that he'd been exempted from further classes and from the final exams so he could go to Hubei, his home province, to arrange his visa. He'd still be going to England.

Coincidence? Or connected with the meeting?

That's the terrible thing about reality. I'm thinking of the movie world alternative, where you can still get some resolution, some closure. Rottenness, for example, is often clearly expounded by the helpful villain himself. We real world types, by contrast, especially those of us in China, live within a fog of ambiguity. It's curious that Hamlet, a creature of a playwright who must have appreciated this distinction (witness Iago's explication of his own wickedness), omits this additional woe:

[W]ho would bear ...
The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of despis'd love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office, and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
...
But that the dread of something after death,--
The undiscover'd country, from whose bourn
No traveller returns,--puzzles the will,
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;

Seems to me it's this country that's all too undiscover'd. And if he's implying that less "conscience" would help, I'd say give us more so we can at least get a better look at this lousy situation.

Writing exam questions, by the way, is a rare opportunity to coerce people to think about something you've tried to tell them. So some questions pertained to the letter I'd written to the students. They got most answers right:

"It's easy for young people to choose the wrong path. Many young people in the world, however, are lucky enough to be pushed onto the right path by their parents or their schools."

Q: According to the letter, the pre-ICB students are lucky. T/F.

"Without physical effort, you can never develop muscles and be strong. It's exactly the same with mental effort."

Q: The letter says that A) too much effort can hurt a child; B) the mind, like the body, cannot become strong if the person does not make an effort; C) only poor people have muscles, so people who have money should not work hard; D) even people without muscles can be heroes if they work hard at school.

"Criticism is normally voiced far from the hearing of the person concerned. That's the rule in the West, and it's still more true in Chinese culture, where you avoid confrontation as much as possible.... Of course, you should be at least a bit skeptical when you hear such stories.... A mark of integrity for genuine criticism is to present it to the person(s) being criticized and offer the opportunity for response."

Q: Say there are two people, John and Mary, and John is saying bad things about Mary. List which are true, according to the letter: If John is a normal member of Western culture, then John -- A) will; B) will not -- let Mary hear what he says about her. If John is a normal member of Chinese culture, then John -- C) will; D) will not -- let Mary hear what he says about her.

Q: The reason you should be skeptical is that A) the bad things may not be true; B) you should not listen to bad things people say about other people; C) it is best to understand the bad things in the world as well as you can; D) if you are not skeptical, you cannot become strong.